Goodbye to my best year so far, hello to the year that will trump the last.

Did not have time to write about this earlier, but 2013 was indeed my best year yet. I will try to be brief with all the amazing things that the Lord has done for me this year, but it has been so mindblowing that I can barely articulate all the miracles in one sitting.

I stepped out of 2012 into 2013 with a fair amount of regret and a huge sense of wasted time. There were many areas in my life that felt like they had fallen into various states of disrepair. When I stepped into 2013, I felt the Lord tell me that there would be accelerated restoration this year (in 2013). It was hard to believe that the Lord would come through for me in these parts of my life when all the areas that needed restoring had been trouble of my own making.

But the Lord went to work at making all things new and turning my mourning, regrets, bitterness and resentment into joy, peace, fulfillment and contentment.

1. For the ministry that I had felt like I had grown exhausted of, God suddenly saw fit to have me appointed as a leader and called me into full-time within a short 4 month period. I wanted to start a business, build my personal brand, get my name out there as an artist. But God said, “Come and serve me, and specifically, serve me in the youth ministry.” 6 months on, much prayer and tears later, I can say without a shadow of a doubt that the Lord has given me the BEST job for ME I could have ever dreamt of having in the here and now. For all the camps, events, services that I got to plan for, design, make videos, collaterals and pretty things for – This has been a dream come true.

2. For the design team that has grown from 4 at the end of December 2012, to 8, and finally 16 at the close of 2013. I remember all the years before, designing for event after event, asking the Lord when there would ever be other designers who would come in, not just to support the ministry, but to be a family that would support each other in the creative journey. Back there it felt like those people did not even exist. But I know now that the Lord has been faithfully building up the people and bringing them in for such a time as this as we grow to support the ministry in an even greater way.

3. For the Spark leadership and Deaconess IReen. Because you guys are the family I call home in this ministry, especially in this season.

4. For Colin, who was an answered prayer at a time I wasn’t even asking questions. God knew what I wanted, needed, was asking for and He sent you. You are the best thing that has happened to me in 2013. :)

For every area that caused me the greatest hurt in 2012, God restored 7 times more in quality and quantity. Indeed He have given me beauty in all areas of my life in place of the ashes I thought they had become.

His goodness to me has far exceeded any hopes or expectations I had dared to dream of.

So even in my unbelief, you have been faithful Lord. I’m so thankful that how much You come through me has nothing to do with my level of faith but the completion of the work of Jesus on the cross.

Looking forward to 2014 with confidence that Your love toward me will always be MORE THAN ENOUGH. :)

On Monday I will turn 24. Not very young, not very old. Just one year closer to literally being in my mid-twenties (big deal). We live in an age where people don’t remember birthdays anymore because Facebook is there to remember it for us. I myself am guilty of the same charge. Not because I let Facebook remember them for me, but because I felt guilty when I started to not remember them, and therefore decided to just forget everyone’s birthdays so I would just be equally unfair to everyone. 
There was once a time where I did remember and celebrate each precious friend’s birthday in a manner that did let them know that they were loved and appreciated and that I was so glad that they were born and somehow found their way into my life. But that time feels rather distant now, the same way friends used to send birthday and Christmas cards by snail mail. (There was a time each Christmas would mean at least 20 snail mail cards making their way to my home.)
Again, this is my fault on my part for having sucked at keeping in touch or treasuring the people I ought to have treasured in the course of achieving my workaholic goals. While I did attain some measure of limited success in my creative and professional pursuit, the trade-off is that friends now are few and far in between. And most of them are not the ones whom I would call in the middle of the night after a bad break-up so that they can look at my pathetic self having a major cry-out. 
But I digress. The point of this post was to say that this year on my birthday, to “celebrate”, I will be going offline for 24hours. Which means no social media, online media or mobile media. Distracting myself is something that I am the ultimate champion of. And I have decided that I will have a day entirely free of distractions. No Facebook, Pinterest, Whatsapp, Instagram, Twitter or any of the likes. So instead of wondering if anyone would remember (considering the fact that even my closest friends and I do not have a habit of remembering or celebrating each other’s birthdays), or if I’m going to receive anything other than polite handphone greetings/Facebook wall messages from those who have it down as a reminder in some birthday calendar or another, I’ll rather spend my day having a long chat with God, something I’ve not done in a while because I’m so good at filling my life with distractions of every kind.
Although some may believe that the people they deem to be “anointed” or “talented in God’s way” are holy all the time, we truly do have our bad days. God uses me in spite of and despite my many flaws that leak out of the broken seams of a creative mind constantly struggling with the realist world. And I am grateful that He loves me where I am, right here, feeling so very much human and not in the least bit the “hallelujah praise the Lord” Christian (as I like to describe the people whom we hold up on a pedestal to be the “perfect, holding it all together” believer). 
I believe, without a shadow of any doubt, that God has called me to serve in His house, and that this is a calling I will never be able to run away from. Whatever He leads me to do I will follow. But there are still many areas that He is growing me in and that He will give me the patience to see come to pass. I am ever impatient to see results, but I’ve learned that anything that is not done in His time is always only second best; and that the things that are perfected in His time, always bear a greater mark of grace and ease than anything I try to attain by myself. 
So yes. 24 hours of no distractions. 24 hours of clarity and time spent listening and waiting on the Lord. Because it is needful in this time. 

On Monday I will turn 24. Not very young, not very old. Just one year closer to literally being in my mid-twenties (big deal). We live in an age where people don’t remember birthdays anymore because Facebook is there to remember it for us. I myself am guilty of the same charge. Not because I let Facebook remember them for me, but because I felt guilty when I started to not remember them, and therefore decided to just forget everyone’s birthdays so I would just be equally unfair to everyone. 

There was once a time where I did remember and celebrate each precious friend’s birthday in a manner that did let them know that they were loved and appreciated and that I was so glad that they were born and somehow found their way into my life. But that time feels rather distant now, the same way friends used to send birthday and Christmas cards by snail mail. (There was a time each Christmas would mean at least 20 snail mail cards making their way to my home.)

Again, this is my fault on my part for having sucked at keeping in touch or treasuring the people I ought to have treasured in the course of achieving my workaholic goals. While I did attain some measure of limited success in my creative and professional pursuit, the trade-off is that friends now are few and far in between. And most of them are not the ones whom I would call in the middle of the night after a bad break-up so that they can look at my pathetic self having a major cry-out. 

But I digress. The point of this post was to say that this year on my birthday, to “celebrate”, I will be going offline for 24hours. Which means no social media, online media or mobile media. Distracting myself is something that I am the ultimate champion of. And I have decided that I will have a day entirely free of distractions. No Facebook, Pinterest, Whatsapp, Instagram, Twitter or any of the likes. So instead of wondering if anyone would remember (considering the fact that even my closest friends and I do not have a habit of remembering or celebrating each other’s birthdays), or if I’m going to receive anything other than polite handphone greetings/Facebook wall messages from those who have it down as a reminder in some birthday calendar or another, I’ll rather spend my day having a long chat with God, something I’ve not done in a while because I’m so good at filling my life with distractions of every kind.

Although some may believe that the people they deem to be “anointed” or “talented in God’s way” are holy all the time, we truly do have our bad days. God uses me in spite of and despite my many flaws that leak out of the broken seams of a creative mind constantly struggling with the realist world. And I am grateful that He loves me where I am, right here, feeling so very much human and not in the least bit the “hallelujah praise the Lord” Christian (as I like to describe the people whom we hold up on a pedestal to be the “perfect, holding it all together” believer). 

I believe, without a shadow of any doubt, that God has called me to serve in His house, and that this is a calling I will never be able to run away from. Whatever He leads me to do I will follow. But there are still many areas that He is growing me in and that He will give me the patience to see come to pass. I am ever impatient to see results, but I’ve learned that anything that is not done in His time is always only second best; and that the things that are perfected in His time, always bear a greater mark of grace and ease than anything I try to attain by myself. 

So yes. 24 hours of no distractions. 24 hours of clarity and time spent listening and waiting on the Lord. Because it is needful in this time. 

On sympathy and action.

There was a horrific accident here in my country. Then there came the usual cacophony of noise on social media and the likes.

Here on these platforms that give us a voice, all we do is contribute another layer of noise. Just because we are given a platform to speak it does not mean that what we say is important. 

I am getting increasingly tired of the noise. Today I did something out of my comfort zone. I could no longer stand being the digital bystander, watching in horrified disgust at the tragedy of another family. So I did what I felt led to do, although it was not convenient for me, although it was something I didn’t need to do. But I did it. And there was peace in doing it. 

This will not be just “another” new year.

Entering a new year, like celebrating yet another birthday, can become increasingly “meaningless” the older we grow. Some may say its social construct to be celebrating an arbitrary day that apart from its emotional significance to ourselves, is no different from any other day before or after. 

But I think that new years are really important for us as human beings precisely because we are so emotionally attached to everything in our environments. Setting aside a day that serves as a “restart” button is something we really do need, psychologically. 

I’ve never met anyone who has gone through a year thinking to themselves at the end of December that they’ve done so good – they wouldn’t change a thing about the year that is to come. Whether we make resolutions that we intend to keep, or flippantly muse to ourselves on what we would change or want to see change in the new year, every transition from 31 December to 1 January gives us the opportunity to “start on a clean slate”. Or resolve to, anyway. 

It’s the same reason why we need weekends, the same reason why we need rest days. For a good part of 2012 I found myself working literally 7 days a week. And it’s only when you’re doing that that you realize the importance of breaks, “me time” and why people are people and machines are machines (even machinery needs breaks and proper maintenance to continue to function optimally). 

So for 2013, like every year, I don’t have resolutions. Because I’m impossible at keeping them. But I have started making some lifestyle changes because working 7 days a week is no way to live a life, and is in fact, more likely the express path to an earlier grave. 

This year I will be focusing on kickstarting my business. And God has been extremely faithful in nudging me in this direction. I’m excited to see where things go. And you can drop by sometime, on this blog that I will be terrible at maintaining, to see how I’m progressing on this front.

More than half of January is over. Just a little more than 11 months to go. :)  

Back to blogging.

So I’ve been absolutely horrendous at maintaining a blog. Somehow this doesn’t seem to stop me from trying anyway. Here I’ll be posting my doodles and some of my work, old and new, as well as some of the projects I’m working on as and when I can talk about them.

I will be starting my own line of design products this year. Or so I’ll like to believe that I’ll be able to. :)